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I really like how you emphasized the use of social media and how can this affect us. Especially to this generation social media is a part of our daily life. Young ones are commonly exposed to several things and is important to address this situation. Also, I think your point is narrowed enough and that will lead to accurate research. However, take a little bit more of time to read through your sentences to make sure they are engaging the reader in order for the reader to understand your points and concerns. Also, your sentences need to be more complex.